Healthy Relationships

Hi readers! Welcome to another mental training session. Today we will be talking about relationships. Not like your typical relationships between people but rather relationships with certain situations. To be more specific, we are going to dive into relationships with winning and losing. Winning and losing is a huge part of our lives whether we like it or not. There will be instances in your life when you're winning in certain areas and there will be times where you lose. It's how you deal with those instances that can change your life. Most of the time the battle on dealing with instances are in between your ears(the Mind).

More often than not we win a lot in our lives but the moment we lose all hell breaks loose. We can be killing it in whatever space we find ourselves in for months and then one L just makes you cave in and now you're in a deep spiral of how you think you're not good enough. The key is here is to change our relationship with both winning and losing. With winning, it's important to not get too big headed and get complacent. Staying hungry is necessary in order to keep on winning because the higher the levels, the harder it is going to be. Take time to be grateful for those wins, just because it is normal to you does not mean it is normal for everyone.

Now here's the hard one, losing. Losing can be frustrating because you came up short after putting in a substantial amount of time and effort into something. It is important that you don't let the loses get to your heart. What I mean by that is that you must not identify with that loss. Just because you failed a test or lost a game does not make you a failure. Yes you failed in this instance but your whole life isn't a fail. Learn to separate the two. Failure is where you learn the most. Allow yourself to shift your mind around failure because it isn't as scary as it might seem. Even if people see you fail, it is okay because the act of attempting at something is sometimes more rewarding than the actual prize itself.

One of the best ways that has helped me change my relationship is winning and losing is that I have become more process oriented over the years. Do I want to win and succeed at everything I do, of course! However, I have learned that I will not win every time. Knowing this I had to shift my mind to enjoy the process to get to win rather than winning itself. Same thing with losing, I hate losing just as much as the next man but shifting my mind to focus on the journey and embracing that makes losing less scary. I always try to tell people that when you are deeply immersed in the process then you will 9/10 never worry about losing just because you're having so much fun to begin with.

So take time to recognize all the ways that you're winning and don't let one loss define your whole being. You are not less than because you lost and you are not more than because you won. You are uniquely you and nobody can take that. I hope this post teaches you to shift your mind around winning and losing. Best of luck on your own personal road to greatness.

Until Next Time,

- E. Ibadin